Let your t-shirt do the talking

The top trend for 2013 in the t-shirt world was the bold one word message. The irony adorning chests up and down the country became nauseatingly predictable. From self proclaimed Geek to the more edgy NERD we have grown accustomed to see a big bold one word message cover the chest of people on every high street from London to John o Groats. 

The cult band t-shirt saw a revival this year that perhaps would have had original fans wondering why all these kids wearing a Ramones t-shirt were dancing to One Direction. When a bands so famous that their clothes are outselling their music you have to start hating fashion. A music t-shirt must be earned, either through the ear bleeding dedication of a repeat loop of a favourite album on your Walkman (sorry couldn't bring myself to promote that piece of fruit company) or from your own attendance at an earth shatteringly greatest night of your life at a sticky floored venue surrounded by more sweat that a Sumo referee.

Finally we must give a nod to the genius who thought this year would be a great time to make superhero logos cool. I mean for generations it has been the shunned past time of the comic book collector to wear the logo under their school shirt, you know just in case. Now we can see Batman, Superman, more Batman and maybe a Captian America logo feature on t-shirts and crop tops in the fashion boutiques of Soho to the bargain aisles of Asda.

Whats hot for 2014

Getting political in the UK will be unavoidable given the current financial meltdown and potential end of a 300 year old Union of Scotland and England. Political t-shirts are great for getting your message across without having to enter the potentially difficult conversations you may have. But beware because if you end up pictured next to Barack Obama in a George Bush t-shirt the snipers may take you out!

Being unique in a world where clothing is made in the thousands by overworked impoverished labour in terrible condition is hard. The rise of personalization will tap into the backlash about globalization and the rejection of uniformity in our society. People aspire to be cool, to be cool you need to lead the pack and get away from the mass produced t-shirts of our low cost providers.

Each year boundaries get blurred between decent and not, from the early days of girls dancing  in leggings to the naked riding of a wrecking ball pop culture has consistentyl tried to push the boundaries. A natural progression from the GEEK chic of 2013 will see the more offensive side of self proclamation of geekary. 

Whatever next year holds, just remember that the 8inch squared window of your chest should be a reflection of your personality, not the personality that society dictates should be cool. Make a New Year's resolution to be more you!

Destination T-Shirts - Tourist tat or Love that?

Certain times in your life you find money burning a hole in your pocket, those last few days on holiday where you buy all the tat you can find just to get rid of the money. Rather than stick it in a tip to the overworked maid we rush around buying all wonders of rubbish to bring back to our loved ones. From 'hand' crafted wooden statues to hats with destinations we find any excuse to part ourselves from that hard earned cash.

Over my thirty years on this planet I have received a number of bad t-shirts, from the ridiculous to the just plain pointless. On any given sunny day you just walk around a housing estate and see hundreds of amateur gardeners wearing a random collection of destination t-shirts, from New York to Mexico they are used as the rubbish "get it dirty" t-shirt. The main reason these t-shirts are crap is because someone else gave you it, they actually bought you a momento of the place you didn't go. The adventure and amazing people are second hand you need to forge your own memories, buying the t-shirt from that crazy little shop you found is all part of that experience. So what are the best ways to cement that holiday:

Place Names

The most common type of destination t-shirt is of course a place name t-shirt. Simple and self explanatory these t-shirts showcase where you have been and the more unusual the better. Hard Rock Cafe began a huge trend with their restaurants all around the world featuring the place name and familiar logo. Like all trends it meant the more familiar a place name the less kudos you got for having traveled there. So the key to a good Place Name t-shirt is actually in finding the place that nobody else has been, or perhaps even heard of.

Local Sayings

Being in a foreign country can be exciting and any form of language barrier even if it is just the local slang can provide a good source of conversation. During my time printing t-shirts I often find much hilarity in the arrival of Australians to my sleepy little town of Dunbar. Locally known as 'Sunny Dunny' this conjures up thoughts of a well light toilet for many travelers from down under. The Sunny Dunny t-shirt is a must have for those who discover the rich history of the birth place of the great John Muir and the sunniest place in Scotland.

Irony

Being ironic is an art form in the UK, t-shirts with ironic sayings are  very common, but finding them especially in the US is a difficult task. They just don't get irony. So what makes a great ironic t-shirt, the double bluff? or perhaps a simply statement of non fact? Well the beauty of it is most t-shirts are relatively straight forward, so people will be confused if irony is in play or not.

Just Plain Weird

 

We all love the random nature of life and purchasing a destination t-shirt which is so strange you just got to have it is a great way to tell a story from your travels, one that might keep the audience engaged for all of fifteen seconds. Local politics and strange habits will be the most common strange t-shirts that nobody outwith the local area will get. Perhaps a misplaced t-shirt, like finding a Golden Eagle emblazoned t-shirt in a back alley of Iraq. You find the more remote the destination the more likely you are to find an unusual item. On a trip to John O Groats (the tip of mainland UK for those not hot on geography) a friend of mine discovered a 'golliwog' which used to feature as a character on jam jars but were rightly taken out of public sale due to their racist connotations. The shop keeper was astonished to find they actually sold them but happily sold the doll to my friend. That kind of unusual item carries a lot of value, not because of the value of the actual item but because of the story it comes with.

All the examples are from our back catalogue of printed tops made for numerous tourists from all over the globe. Scottish T-shirts are hugely popular with tourists, featuring tartan writing or simply celebrating the place they are visiting you can find something for everyone.

5 of the Best Delivery Methods

All this talk about unmanned drones delivering your box set of the vampire diaries may have captured the imagination of those that like to think of a Futurama style society with all the tech you can imagine, but in fact cool delivery systems have been around for a long time. Ever since man discovered they didn't have to go and get something themselves they have invented more and more ways to get things brought direct to them with little effort and in funny ways. I can think of plenty of things I'd rather do deliveries than a rather flimsy helicopter so let's take a bit of a trip through history.

Medieval Messengers

So the first form of message delivery was to get someone of lower standing than yourself to go and deliver your letter, parcel or present. This was always a rubbish job, you spent most of your life living in fear that you may be delivering a rather nasty message which would lead to you being shanked like a freshly spitroasted chicken. The job was reserved for fit young men who could ride a horse and handle the treacherous and often brutal conditions on the journey. Lets face it, if it wasn't for civilisation and the human rights act we'd all love to have our own messengers, sending someone out into the pissing rain by horse to deliver your message may reduce the number of times you get a ONE WORD TEXT!

Telegraphy

 This cut out the middle man, using electricity to save your legs by then it did end up being painfully annoying to have to go to a centrally connected place to send a message. Not much use to the outliers of the electric revolution. It was the basis for much of communication for decades and spawned a whole new world, in essence it was the first remote form of communication that could actually spell out words. Of course making a correction was a ball ache and you couldn't use sarcasm for fear of being misunderstood.

Pizza Delivery Bikes

During the 80's I believed that Pizza delivery was the sole job of any teenager who had a crap moped. In reality I have never had a pizza delivered by moped but that may have something to do with my living in the UK, the films I watched were always from Hollywood and the Yanks have some insane laws about letting kiddies drive cars on the actual fracking road! Still it appears this form of delivery lives on in the world of pornography, each teenager accepting the crap rates of pay in the hope of a flash from a gorgeous girl. In reality your more likely to be bitten by a rabid dog but good luck!

Owls

Owls have been very popular since Hogwarts shot their usefulness as delivery beasts into the public domain. Now the official ring bearers of many a wedding the life of an owl has become a commodity. More so we see that a rather forward thinking organisation like Waterstones has taken this opportunity to begin training owls to deliver books, after all an owl is much more exciting that an ex-US army drone that has been decommissioned but may still have that base programming to destroy all human life. If you want to read the announcement from Waterstones I suggest you visit the Q&A but remember they only just though of it this morning.

3D Printing

The idea behind this is actually that why should you have things delivered. Firstly the most ordered products from Amazon are CDs, DVDs and books, whats wrong with people, you can download or stream any of those things virtually and completely neutralise your carbon footprint! The eventual idea behind 3D printing is that you will be able to have a replicator in your own home to produce anything you can find the blueprints for on Google. So man reaches a new age of not ever having to even interact with someone ringing your doorbell, GREAT, YAY FOR HUMANITY!

What does your t-shirt say about you?

T-shirts are globally the most worn piece of outer clothing. Everyone has a t-shirt in their wardrobe and some have an amazing collection, but have you ever wondered what people see when you walk past them with your t-shirt on? A walking bilboard to your personality, a gateway to your mind or simply a projection of what you believe, the slogan on your chest is important.

Little Symbols

If you wear a t-shirt which has nothing more than a corporate logo then effectively you are nothing more than a walking advert. Brands want to market their clothing in adverts using cool people, pretty people, young people, etc. You aren't the advert and you shouldn't pretend to be. They say a cluttered place is a sign of a cluttered mind, but by that logic what does it make an empty room. Buying clothing for their street cred label is a foolish idea and shows a lack of free thinking. 

 Im Hip and I'm Cool

By getting on a bandwagon you can appear to others to be a sheep, buying a Keep Calm t-shirt in 2013 is kind of like showing up for a Beatles gig in 1999 and wondering why nobody else is there. You are so late for the party that you don't even get a beer, the cool kids have paired off and gone home and you only appeal to the left overs, who are probably so drunk they won't remember who you are in two seconds. Being hip and cool is a race, you need to be on the ball, ready to get that must have item before everyone else does, seeing a t-shirt on the TV or worn by your favourite pop star is a great way to inspire something that interests you but why wait till that local Chain outlet is selling them, get your own one made up especially for you, with your own little twist today, yes right now here is a link to get your own personalised t-shirt.

I'm Political

I love political t-shirts even if I don't love the message I like to conviction it shows in the wearer, proud to announce to complete strangers their views. A message can be powerful, provoke thought and spark political interest in an otherwise uninterested party. The only issue with political attire is that you may end up finding yourself stuck on a tube train in rush hour surrounded by corporate wage slaves wearing an Anarchy t-shirt and know exactly what loneliness is. So wear it proud but don't get yourself into danger.

I Don't get Irony

I was big into the Indie scene growing up and part of my love of music meant I wanted to learn about these musical Gods. I listened to interviews, I read every bit of the album insert and I even would sit up late to watch documentaries. I understood their message, their perspective and I put my own feeling and stamp on what the music meant to me. Seeing someone wear a Nirvana t-shirt depresses me, Kurt Cobain was ashamed of the success and vehicle for money his music became, selling out is a rock stars nightmare and seeing crowds of kids wear smiley faces would be enough to make you turn in your grave.

I'm Outrageous

I'm so outrageous I wear a t-shirt which will offend lots of people. Not only that I'm really proud of wearing an offensive t-shirt. I would never wear offensive language on my chest because I wouldn't want to subject children to it. It shows a lack of class and a total ignorance of your local community. It may seem funny or outrageous at first but in the end you simply project the message that you don't care and are to be avoided.

I'm in Trouble

Wearing a t-shirt in the wrong place at the wrong time is enough to make anyone sweat. Like the wearing a George Bush t-shirt to an Obama conference or a Blur t-shirt to an Oasis gig you are taking a big risk. Of course if thats your aim then lets hope you know kung fu.

Not my Kids - 5 of the worst Uni jobs!

The best thing about higher education is that you can put off actually having to make a decision about your future career for another 4 years. Unfortunately unless your parents are wealthy and supportive then going to University is not the easy government grant funded adventure it used to be, more than likely as a student you will need a casual job. Paying for things when you move out of home is hard, beer and food alone can take up most of your student loan so how do you pay for accomodation and basic heating on top? Getting a job when a student can also be tricky, especially if you don't do retail!

So as a student what are some of the more popular ways to make money? Easy money is hard to come by especially if your looking for the kind of work that your parents would approve of, so maybe tell them that you got a job on the campus library and hope they never check your payslips!

Stripping

Taking your clothes off for money may be tempting, especially when you consider just how much money you could make but it may also lead to complications with friends and family. Just imagine your uncle walked in for a lap dance or your sister in law was throwing a hen party and you where there. Also think about how you might explain to your mum the bag full of sexy clothing you keep sending home to be washed!

Sperm Bank

Lets face it, whilst not attending lectures you will probably spend a fair amount of time jacking off to internet porn. Do not be tempted to turn this into a career path, students are the most likely group to donate to sperm banks but remember this isn't a decision to be taken lightly, you are potentially helping someone in need conceive a child, thats a real life!

Modelling

For those who are afraid of human interaction webcams have created a boom industry in online 'modelling'. Of course this just means stripping on camera, but be careful because you may be recorded and in ten years time when you apply for that law firm job, they do a quick google face recognition search and pow your porn career comes back to haunt you. The only good thing about cam modelling is that there is a niche for everyone, so even if you are the elephant man you could probably make some cash from it!

 Paid Writing

You really need to get into this for the long term, making money from writing won't happen  quickly and won't pay well unless you put the effort in. Doing paid surveys is just as useless, taking up lots of time and giving you little in return. Of course if you had been a savvy kid then you would already have a well established blog giving you a passive income by now!

Movie Extra

When I was a student I signed up to an agency for extra work, helps if you are in a big city as there are more films and TV shot there. The money is awesome and the job is fun, but you may find that competition is harder these days. If you don't answer you phone when they call you miss out and likely miss out on future jobs too, reliability at short notice is the name of the game!

Computer Game Movies - Does it Ever Work?

Since the 80's Hollywood have been dipping into the creative genuis of Computer games industry to find inspiration. Long gone are the days where it is all one way traffic, a quickly branded game sping off from a successful movie using an old licence for an actual playable game, simply a mechanism to milk more money from the fans with little or no thought. But has this reversed blend of user interactive small screen to big screen ever been a success? Here are five examples of game/movie crossovers.

Mario Brothers - $20m at the Box Office

Excluding regional based movies this was the first major motion picture to reach our screens across the globe in 1993. A game that entertained  generation had such a huge fan base that surely no matter how poor the film was it would be a success right? Eh well no, its hardly even available on DVD now and you won't find many copies of the VHS in lofts either, having all been gifted to the local charity shop!

Tomb Raider - $274m at the Box Office

So how do you make a good movie? First you need to get an A-List star to feature in it. Surely a gorgeous star is more desirable than a computer enhanced image, unfortunately they got this wrong and we quickly discovered the computer version of Lara Croft is indeed not only better looking but also a better actor! But this proved to be the first real money spinner in the Game to Movie industry.

Resident Evil - $102m at the Box Office

Many people don't realise where this franchise began, many believing the film and games go hand in hand, but true fans all know the origin was in one of the most addictive violent games of its time. Zombie culture is old hat now, with the rise of zombie TV shows and films it is all become very mainstream, but this means more and more fans coming to this series, often via the movies. 

Silent Hill - $97m at the Box Office

Groundbreaking games with atmosphere were not the common occurrence you see with HD graphics and online multi-player when Silent Hill gave us all a fright for the first time. This cloudy scare-fest was a sure fire hit for both the movie and the game, foggy and filled with haunting creatures all centered around finding your lost child.  

Prince of Persia - $335m at the Box Office

So before Prince of Persia the most successful cross over has come from the Horror Genre, with a much larger cult following than other genres. But this well made film, complete with believable acting just might have broken the curse. The biggest grossing Game to movie franchise to date.

So where next?

Call of Duty on the big screen or perhaps Grand Theft Auto the movie? Whatever the answer we can be sure that with sales of GTA and COD reaching over $500m in one weekend any movie is unlikely to be as financially viable.

Post Apocalypse Dating Tips

 There are many ways the apocalypse could happen, resulting in the majority of the human race being wiped out. So what do you do when you discover you are in a dwindling pool of singles? Here is some great advice to help you find a perfect match during this difficult time.

Check for bites!

There is not point in getting involved with someone who is about to turn into a flesh eating zombie, or begin to mutate from that radiation during the nukes. Health in a post apocalypse won't be like now, insurance will be nothing more than a paper document you once had and Doctors will be in high demand. If you do fall for a brain hungry gobbler then be sure to keep them on a tight leash, it may offend any other survivors you meet. 

Don't forget to Put the effort in

If Hollywood has taught us anything it is that we are most likely to find ourselves holed up with a gloriously beautiful person, with the apocalypse wiping out the competition your chance has never got better, but to be in with a real shot you do need to shower. Finding a fresh water source and looting some nice clothes may just be worth the risk!

Jealousy is a thing of the Past

With technology networks across the globe now rotting artifacts of a lost civilization then you need not worry about who has just messaged them on facebook, what emails they are getting or that their ex follows them on twitter. If however you still find yourself desperately paranoid then simply loot a decent lie detector kit, with instruction manual, more fun than a game of monopoly!

Avoid the Honey Trap

If I was an atractive single in a post apocalyptic world and needed to find food, shelter and a supply of entertainment I may just use my charms to con people. Don't be fooled by just anyone, just because you stumble across a hot lonely stranger this may not be fate it could in fact be a trap to rob you of your possessions.

Be Safe

You have to find shelter, food and water before you can etch out a life for yourself and your newly discover love. The last thing you need is a baby, so remember there are pharmacies in every town, go get some birth control!

And remember during the apocalypse the internet won't be working, so you cannot rely on online dating websites for your dating needs! If all else fails you can always try setting up a speed dating event, it's easier to go fast when there are hoardes of hungry zombies and looters at the door.

Top 5 Pranks to play on your spouse - The Revenge

So you have been the victim of a cruel prank by someone you thought was the closest to you? You may be feeling like you should strike back quickly but be patient, the thought of what you might do will be added torture for them.

1 - On the loo

 Two of the best types of pranks are bathroom pranks and sleeping pranks. The reason is because it catches them off guard but also because they don't immediately chase after you and give you a beat down! This prank is simple throw water over them and laugh, but sometimes the originals are best.

2 - Ouch up the nose

  

 People look so peaceful when they sleep, but of course not when they have a nose full of hotsauce. Just check for allergies before doing this one!

3 - Slippy when wet

  

Wait on your partner to go for a shower, then lace the floor with butter, easier to do depending on the layout of your bathroom but only works when they are coming out the shower so be stealth like. Another option would to be pour olive oil  under the door!

4 - What waterbed?

  

Your partner always going on about your extravegant spending? Why not surprise them with a water bed, when they first sit on it. they will be like wow its really wavy, until the water soaks through then the laughs begin. Be careful as this can get very messy!

5 - Slap bang wallop

  

Mindless violence is funny, a good hard slap on the bum can be insult enough but this is beyond funny when you also deliver a creampie to the face (not that type you perv). I can see how clowns made a living out of that kinda prank for decades, until they became creepy!

These T-Shirts come with Balls!

People choose their slogans on a t-shirt for a whole host of reasons, from comedy irony to proud proclamation of faith. Choosing when to wear them is key, but some people are either stupid or have some serious balls to pull off a provocative t-shirt in public. 

Here are some great examples:

1. Iran Election t-shirt

If you don't read the news then you won't be aware of the political tension between Iran and the US. The nuclear aspirations of Iran have long been a stumbling block for political discussions between these two countries and the rising tensions of religious beliefs between the two nations doesn't help matters. So when your voting in a predominently Muslim country in an election for a country that has been stifled in its nuclear goals by the US it takes some serious courage to wear a "God Bless America" T-Shirt. Of course it may have been worn ironically, but i wouldn't chance it!

2 - I'm a great dad

If your sick of your kids bringing their friends over the the house, eating all the food and generally making the place a pig sty, then perhaps your should take a leaf out of this guys book. Proclaim your greatness with your t-shirt whilst your choice of shorts will proclaim I am a total embarrassement to my kids. Short shorts are great, we all love short shorts but guys, with bellies shouldn't be sold these, it's like serving a drunk guy another beer, it just shouldn't be allowed!

3 - Creepy pulling t-shirt

Wow your t-shirt is hilarious for about five seconds, and if your wondering around on your own, with sunglasses on and randomly sitting next to hot ladies it is not cool, its very very creepy. Perhaps the sunglasses are to stop the stinging when you get maced?

4 - Gun Violence is cool!

Being a celebrity is difficult, every time you step out the door some red top paper has splashed your outfit for all to see. Many celebs make this work for them by promoting charities or their own new material, or perhaps even a political belief. But picking a subject so devicive is probably a tad too far, people won't like that Uzi and some people will love it. Let's find out on the ratings of your next TV show or film!

5 - Don't date my daughter

Fathers have tried many tactics to get their daughters to not date, from cleaning the barrell of your gun on the porch as he picks her up, to arm wrestling on dining room table. When this unfortunate girl missed curfew her dad got a t-shirt printed, the scariest looking picture he could find of himself emblazened onto her top will no doubt serve its purpose. I guess this would only work if your built like a brick shithouse!

If you have a great idea why not let us know!