Top 5 Pranks to play on your spouse - The Revenge

So you have been the victim of a cruel prank by someone you thought was the closest to you? You may be feeling like you should strike back quickly but be patient, the thought of what you might do will be added torture for them.

1 - On the loo

 Two of the best types of pranks are bathroom pranks and sleeping pranks. The reason is because it catches them off guard but also because they don't immediately chase after you and give you a beat down! This prank is simple throw water over them and laugh, but sometimes the originals are best.

2 - Ouch up the nose

  

 People look so peaceful when they sleep, but of course not when they have a nose full of hotsauce. Just check for allergies before doing this one!

3 - Slippy when wet

  

Wait on your partner to go for a shower, then lace the floor with butter, easier to do depending on the layout of your bathroom but only works when they are coming out the shower so be stealth like. Another option would to be pour olive oil  under the door!

4 - What waterbed?

  

Your partner always going on about your extravegant spending? Why not surprise them with a water bed, when they first sit on it. they will be like wow its really wavy, until the water soaks through then the laughs begin. Be careful as this can get very messy!

5 - Slap bang wallop

  

Mindless violence is funny, a good hard slap on the bum can be insult enough but this is beyond funny when you also deliver a creampie to the face (not that type you perv). I can see how clowns made a living out of that kinda prank for decades, until they became creepy!

These T-Shirts come with Balls!

People choose their slogans on a t-shirt for a whole host of reasons, from comedy irony to proud proclamation of faith. Choosing when to wear them is key, but some people are either stupid or have some serious balls to pull off a provocative t-shirt in public. 

Here are some great examples:

1. Iran Election t-shirt

If you don't read the news then you won't be aware of the political tension between Iran and the US. The nuclear aspirations of Iran have long been a stumbling block for political discussions between these two countries and the rising tensions of religious beliefs between the two nations doesn't help matters. So when your voting in a predominently Muslim country in an election for a country that has been stifled in its nuclear goals by the US it takes some serious courage to wear a "God Bless America" T-Shirt. Of course it may have been worn ironically, but i wouldn't chance it!

2 - I'm a great dad

If your sick of your kids bringing their friends over the the house, eating all the food and generally making the place a pig sty, then perhaps your should take a leaf out of this guys book. Proclaim your greatness with your t-shirt whilst your choice of shorts will proclaim I am a total embarrassement to my kids. Short shorts are great, we all love short shorts but guys, with bellies shouldn't be sold these, it's like serving a drunk guy another beer, it just shouldn't be allowed!

3 - Creepy pulling t-shirt

Wow your t-shirt is hilarious for about five seconds, and if your wondering around on your own, with sunglasses on and randomly sitting next to hot ladies it is not cool, its very very creepy. Perhaps the sunglasses are to stop the stinging when you get maced?

4 - Gun Violence is cool!

Being a celebrity is difficult, every time you step out the door some red top paper has splashed your outfit for all to see. Many celebs make this work for them by promoting charities or their own new material, or perhaps even a political belief. But picking a subject so devicive is probably a tad too far, people won't like that Uzi and some people will love it. Let's find out on the ratings of your next TV show or film!

5 - Don't date my daughter

Fathers have tried many tactics to get their daughters to not date, from cleaning the barrell of your gun on the porch as he picks her up, to arm wrestling on dining room table. When this unfortunate girl missed curfew her dad got a t-shirt printed, the scariest looking picture he could find of himself emblazened onto her top will no doubt serve its purpose. I guess this would only work if your built like a brick shithouse!

If you have a great idea why not let us know!

Google+ - The home of Comedy and Advice

The rise of Google+ in the social networking market is both a blessing and a nightmare. The early adopters of Google+ were mainly bloggers and internet savvy business users, quickly claiming their business profile and beginning to churn out some seriously useful advice. The amount of support and advice, the ease of use and the great functionality meant this social network was a breath of fresh air. Facebook went all corporate and are trying to monetise their systems by force feeding you adds, reducing the newsfeed items from those you want to read replacing them with prominent marketing. Twitter became the playground of trolls and viruses, looking to annoy or infect you. Linkedin is the network for the professional and their complex user interface and difficult navigation makes it a labour intensive excercise. Myspace, do they still exist?

Where did it all go wrong?

Like any good party it starts to sour, the DJ has changed the record and the drunks start to appear. Google+ is now littered with the perverts, the teen angst and yes the cat pictures. What makes google+ really cool was the ability to share content that was good, but in doing this there are entire communities of people who do nothing but share other peoples posts, like some kind of weird echo. It obviously works with thousands following these echos, waiting on the next post they want to rip off, or perhaps in the hope they can share theirs.

Here are five things you will find you come across often on G+

1 - The informative post

2 - The Business post

3 - The 'Funny'

4 - The Political

5 - The Sex

It ain't all that bad!

Alas it isn't all doom and gloom though, you can be picky about who you follow, ensuring you encase them in a well titled circle so you can filter out the nonsense and noise and get to the gold. The other great thing about google+ is the communities, finding them may be increasingly difficult due to the number now on there, but once you get a good one that is well moderated you can find all the advice in the world. A blend of sharing good content and posting your own unique items is the best way to get ahead, as with anything on the internet black hat techniques may get you a thousand followers but it won't get you any quality. Engage with people, comment on posts and share their info but most of all don't post cat pictures, I hate them!

How to get rid of cold callers on the phone!

These days you have probably already registered for the telephone preference service or your local equivalent, but you may find you still get a ridiculous amount of unwanted calls on your phone. So here are some tricks about how to get those cold callers to stop ringing you.

1. Get a Whistle

A loud blast of the whistle will no doubt have the caller throwing their headset down on the desk, that individual won't be bothering you again.

2. Talk dirty to them

These cold callers are getting friendlier, asking your first name and referring to you as 'mate' or 'pal', why not turn the tables on them and get saucy, its sure to at least get them to end the call quickly.

3. Name Drop

Google is only ever a button press away so why not Google their cheif executives details and mention to the cold caller you are personal friends, they will either hang up or mark your account as VIP do not disturb!

4. Leave the Handset

Ask them to explain something then leave the phone off the hook, alternatively say "Oh thats my door i'll be back in a second" this might not immediately reduce the calls but at least the time they wait is time they ain't bugging some other poor sod!

5. Pretend Your the Cops 

The best one by far is to frighten the life out of the cold caller and pretend you are at a murder scene, check out the below video clip for the transcript of how to do this!

Of course the best example would be for you to simply change your number to a premium rate number and let them get charged to call you, making you lots of money and really annoying these cold callers. This may not be entirely legal unless you have a recording to warn callers of your premium rate and you may find yourself leaving your number on websites for quotes of things you don't want, mailing lists, and even bathroom walls, but remember this isn't a full time job it was meant to just stop cold callers!

Politically Charged T-Shirts - Have you got yours?

The news that US government had shut down was music to the ears of one industry, the personalised garment industry. Because they have been in boom time since the announcement with a series of hilarious t-shirts all aiming at the US government and the rather crazy goings on of the biggest world super power. 

From

To

We have seen all kinds of different take on the big political news of the day and it got me thinking, what other politically motivated t-shirts are out there and I came across some corkers. Here are my top five politically motivated t-shirts.

5. Be Green

The environment is often the easiest of political motivations, you see many celebrities adorn a green message on their top, but I like this because its subtle and the printing placement is different. 

4.Anti-Socialist

Socialism is like a dirty word in large sections of the US, thanks to a sustained belief since the cold war that it is just another form or communism. Of course the irony on this anti-Obama T-shirt is that he is not a socialist, in fact he is very much a capitalist and wants to see big profits across big companies.

3. Banksy

The guerrilla artist Banksy says things that the world thinks, he is anti-establishment and anti-capitalism defined, giving his art away for free. This t-shirt is one of his greatest works, funnily enough because he is anonymous he can't claim royalties, d'oh!

2.Free Tibet

The free tibet campaign has been around for a long time and this t-shirt is a great example of how political messages can be powerful on many different levels. Applying to popular culture but also being clear.

1. Scottish Independence

In 2014 the Scottish residents will decide whether they are to be self determined or remained governed by Westminster. This once in a lifetime referendum comes amid some of the worst economic times and sustained cuts to public spending, given the countries more socialistic views we can but hope this vote is a big fat YES!

Have you got an embarrassing political t-shirt of your own? or would you like to make one, let me know your ideas!

What happens when you force kids into stardom? Top 5

All parents want the best for their children but with stardom so coveted around the western world is it any wonder so many child stars are ending up having incredibly public meltdowns. Being in showbiz and constantly under public scrutiny is enough to send anyone round the bend but for a kid who grows up with it and then tries to navigate the difficult world of Adulthood with a back catalogue of embarrasing TV shows and music career it seems to all too often end up in a car crash of publicity stunts and media humiliation.

Our top 5 child stars gone wrong is a list of reasons why you may not wish to push your kids to that TV show audition or pay those thousands for music lessons!

1 - Miley Cyrus

Now famous for twerking with a bloke old enough to be her dad she is a constant car crash of see through dresses, bum flashed and weird hair cuts. This Child TV star who hit the big time with a long running TV show Hannah Montana is the epitimy of everything that is wrong with over sexualisation in the music business. With female stars promoting promiscuis behaviour and competing with each other to be the most outrageous it is only a matter of time before they all start just appearing naked on stage....oh wait a minute we already have Lady Gaga do that!

2 - Britney Spears

The first real disney casualty. she was the recipient of unending press speculation and scrutiny from so many different angles. Leading to a mental breakdown at a ridiculously early age and then being constantly criticised from her parenting skills, relationships or up and down weight loss and gain. If you make millions before your 18 perhaps it would be a better idea to just retire, try to find a normal life.

3 - Michael Jackson

I don't think Michael Jackson was ever a real boy, he was a product of extreme pushy parenting, from dragging him around tours across the globe to the weird allegations of his enjoyment of childrens company this guy never really stood a chance. As talented and loved as he was it was shocking to see the industry literally kill him with attention, but being so famous so young must surely then make you more peculiar as you have never had a chance to be a normal person.

4 - Christina Aguelera

The big battle of Christina vs. Britney for the adorable pop princess crown was interesting media viewing, hyped to all extremes. Looking across at Britney's career she may feel herself lucky to have not won that particular battle given the outcome for her foe.

5 - Rebecca Black

The ultimate pushy parenting comes when you decide to blow a wad of cash on your kid making a record, the record is bad and I mean really bad so your kid then ends up getting more hate mail than the leader of the taliban! This is a sure fire way to screw your kid over by pushing them hard regardless of talent, believing in your kids abilities and lying to them are an important lesson to take from Rebeccas brief fling with fame.

5 of the best ways to quit your job...go on do it now!

Gone are the days of life-long careers working your way up the ranks of a large company or local industry. People these days if they are able to get a job grow tired and bored of it moving on average every 2 to 3 years. This is in part due to the pursuit of more money but also due to the lack of staying power, let's be honest nobody wants a boss like Simon Cowell pointing out your flaws everyday, or worse a foul mouths ranter like Gordon Ramsay who will most likely send you insane with stress and anxiety.

So if you find yourself at that point in time you need to leave your job ask yourself the following question: Can you afford to burn this bridge? If the answer is Yes then here is some great ways to do it, otherwise just enjoy these nuggets of other peoples strength!

Tell the truth - The temptation is of course to lie and say your pleasant goodbyes to those people who used to say good morning to you but had no idea what they did for a living, get your crap bottle of leaving wine and then sail out the doors with a smile on your face. But why should you have to pretend that it's ok, why not just blow your load and tell everyone the truth, "thanks for the work but I'm no longer deemed good enough bye!" That is exactly what Groupon CEO did when he penned a letter to staff saying "People of Groupon, After four and a half intense and wonderful years as CEO of Groupon, I’ve decided that I’d like to spend more time with my family. Just kidding — I was fired today."

Write it in a cake - Penning your letter of resignation can be tedious, the fine line between bitter honesty and polite sentiment. Most letters don't come as a surprise, if you are at that stage then others around you have probably already told your boss you are miserable, either in an attempt to get your job or simply because the brown stain on their nose was rubbing off. Baking a cake is a win/win situation, people get a nice cake, you get to say goodbye in a tasteful way! (get it TASTE-full)

Do it on Social media - Facebook has often gotten employees in trouble with their bosses, forgetting they are on your friends list is a bad mistake to make. 

But if you intentionally quit your job on Facebook it will go down in history and get the gossip going around the water cooler. Being able to say what you want is always easier in written format, the lack of instant reply lets you get out all your grievances in one go. But remember anything written can be saved and used against you, so don't be asking for a reference any time soon.

Just go AWOL - After a particularly hard day at my catering job during my University days I decided I wouldn't go back, to be honest I was on my fifth shot of tequila when I decided, knowing the chances of me waking up the next day were slim so there would be no way I was going in. 

The boss was a dragon, the type of women you see in Victorian period dramas directing all those house maids and servants around. I just never went back in, having another job in the next week I figured best to just never mention I was already employed around the corner. About six months later I received some back pay (minus the cost of my uniform that I had never returned) and that was that. Being a Uni job it wasn't really something I was relying on for references but to my surprise there was a glowing reference from my boss, so perhaps they realised the errors of their tyrannical ways and hopefully it made some future employees life a little easier.

Do it on National TV - Being a journalist and having morals doesn't usually go hand in hand, but this video shows how damaging it can be to your boss to quit in front of the customers. Especially if there are thousands of them watching you. Making a public stand can actually open doors of employment up elsewhere creating a mini-celebrity persona for you. 

So that's it, you have now got a way to quit your job, if only you had a sure fire way to pay your bills then you could use one them tomorrow!